Another dangerous practice that we can add to the list—one that has seriously harmed the Lord’s church—is that of husbands mistreating their wives. This has been a very serious problem for a long time, and one that continues to cause pain, sorrow, and division in many homes. The mistreatment of wives by their husbands can be seen in the following ways:

1. Failing to love their wives as Christ loved the church (Eph. 5:25)
2. Treating their wives harshly (Col. 3:19)
3. Failing to provide for the physical and spiritual needs of the home (1 Tim. 5:8)
4. Failing to be the spiritual head of the home (Eph. 5:23)
5. Not treating their wives as the weaker vessel (1 Pet. 3:7)
6. Using words that wound and emotionally destroy (Eph. 4:29)
7. Being unfaithful to them (Matt. 5:28; Heb. 13:4)
8. Neglecting the time and attention they should give them (Eccl. 9:9)
9. Acting with selfishness and pride (Phil. 2:3–4)
10. Physically abusing their wives through domestic violence.

These are only some of the ways a husband can mistreat his wife. Such practices are sinful before God and completely contrary to the divine design for marriage.

Sadly, the mistreatment of wives by their husbands is something that has been observed even in some churches of the Lord. Beloved brethren, this must never be the case in our marriages. The Christian home should be a place where love, respect, understanding, and peace reign. It has never been God’s will for a wife to live in fear, sadness, or insecurity. Marriage was established by God for blessing and companionship (Gen. 2:18, 24), not for suffering or abuse.

The apostle Paul wrote the following to the saints in Ephesus:

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones” (Eph. 5:25–30).

Through this section we can observe how the apostle instructs husbands to:

1. Love their wives with a deep, sacrificial love that imitates Christ’s love for His church,
2. Always seek the physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being of their wives,
3. Love and care for their wives as their own bodies, and
4. Treat their wives with tenderness, patience, and consideration.

Every husband who obeys these directives will keep himself far from mistreating his wife. However, every husband who ignores the commandments God has established for marriage will end up destroying his own home and drifting away from the divine will.

The Bible clearly teaches that the character of a Christian must reflect gentleness, self-control, and love. Paul wrote: “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice” (Eph. 4:31). He also wrote: “And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another” (Eph. 4:32). A husband who constantly lives in anger, shouting, threats, and violence is acting in a way that is incompatible with the Christian life.

The apostle Peter also instructed husbands, saying:

“Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered” (1 Pet. 3:7).

This passage emphasizes that a husband must honor and respect his wife. The man who humiliates, despises, or mistreats his wife endangers his relationship with God, for his prayers will be hindered.

It is also important to remember that children suffer greatly when they witness violence and mistreatment in the home. A home filled with shouting, threats, and aggression leaves deep emotional wounds. Christian parents must raise their children “in the discipline and admonition of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4), showing by their example what a godly and God-pleasing marriage looks like.

Therefore, what else can be done to prevent the mistreatment of wives? Husbands, consider the following:

1. Remember that your wife is a great blessing in your life (Prov. 18:22)
2. Remember that your wife must be treated with love, dignity, and respect (1 Pet. 3:7)
3. Remember that failing to treat your wife well will result in your prayers not being heard or answered by God (1 Pet. 3:7)
4. Remember that true love “does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked” (1 Cor. 13:4–7)
5. Remember that you will give account to God for the way you treated your family (Rom. 14:12; 2 Cor. 5:10), and
6. Remember that mistreating your wife can result in the loss of your hope of eternal life if there is no genuine repentance (Rom. 6:23).

It is imperative to remember that mistreating your wife will prevent you from experiencing spiritual growth according to God’s will. Marriage is an institution established by God and, as such, must be respected and held in high honor (Heb. 13:4). God has already provided sufficient instruction to enjoy a beautiful and stable relationship in marriage. Therefore, let us always strive to show love, patience, respect, and faithfulness toward our wives. Only then will we have strong homes, healthy marriages, and congregations that are pleasing before God.